I entitled this post 'Full' because 'Cup Runneth Over' is a bit too cliche'.
The truth though is, my cup does runneth over. I feel like in a turn-around of a month - which really isn't THAT long looking back from this side of the valley - I have gone from desert, cracks-in-the-earth dry in mind, soul and spirit to soaking wet from a full dousing in emotional, spiritual and intellectual blessings.
The last one on that list surprises me as I have at turns hidden behind and even thrived in my adopted and proclaimed role as 'the class clown' and/or 'the jock', never the academic. At least in seminary (as opposed to college which is a post for another day) I did the work and my grades were respectable but I never would be caught dead uttering phrases like 'historical-critical thought' or 'contextual theology'. And if a difficult question was raised I would content myself not with trying to find the answer but with trying to find the exact right timing to utter the tentative response, "Jesus?" in order to get the biggest laugh (that still does get a great HUGE laugh, by the way).
This past week, I was invited into a group by someone who took a crazy chance that not only could I bring the funny... I could also bring the thought. I was honored, I was nervous, I was tentative and as the time became closer at hand I was: Freaked. Out.
I did the work. I hoped that my longer time in practical ministry would offset my limited rememberings of academic works and I showed up to the table.
And it was good.
I have remarked in previous posts about my faith journey and my stubbornness about accepting that God is in the details. And yet at the time MOST necessary, when I was passed out from dehydration panting on the floor and barely had it in me to press '9-1-1' my dry, empty soul was refilled.
First through strengthened friendships, touch, space to BE, and a reminder that I do care and that I am Beloved. And then through new friends, diving into the Text, being welcomed to the Table and realizing that Jock and Funny are not the only things that name me.
If you have been a part of that piece of the journey this last month you know who you are and thank you.
If you have been a part of who allowed me to be on that piece of the journey this last month you know who you are and thank you.
In Plan B: Further Thoughts on Faith Anne Lamott opens her book with the story of being in her own dry place and meeting up with a friend that she is able to help through the random act of the "ham of God." Her words echo my own thoughts on how quickly we can go from dry to full:
"Later, thinking about [my friend], I remembered the seasonal showers in the desert, how potholes in the rocks fill up with rain. When you look later, there are already frogs in the water, and brine shrimp reproducing, like commas doing the Macarena; and it seems, but only seems, that you went from parched to overflow in the blink of an eye."[i]
I work for the Lord and yet I have been totally caught off guard by how quickly my one word description for who I am and how I am is no longer 'done.
Friends, I am 'full'.
[i] Lamott, Anne. Plan B: Further Thoughts on Faith. New York: Riverhead, 2005. Pages 9 – 11.