Monday, October 03, 2005

Pieces O' Banana

I had grand visions of giving my 8 month old chunks of banana and a graham cracker with some apple juice and him eating them, grateful for a snack while I made (read: warmed up) the rest of his lunch and awed him with my mothering talents. Instead I learned the following:

  1. Baby will put everything he finds on the floor into his mouth.
  2. The one thing you want him to put in his mouth, he will put on the floor.
  3. The dog does not like banana.
  4. Banana on the floor is very slippery.
  5. Bargain brand graham crackers are too hard to melt in baby’s mouth.
  6. The dog does like graham crackers - even bargain brand.
  7. There are only so many times you can keep a tall dog from licking a dangling baby hand covered in food.
  8. Even if that food is banana.
  9. Taking the stopper out of a sippy cup to make it easier for baby to use is okay… in and of itself.
  10. Leaving fully secured baby and going 3 feet to let dog outside (see #7) is okay… in and of itself.
  11. #9 + #10 = VERY WET BABY!
  12. It also makes for a very wet floor, tray, bib, table, etc…
  13. Yet miraculously the bargain brand graham crackers that were on the tray are still too hard to eat.
  14. AND FINALLY... Nothing sounds sweeter than the deep breathing of a well showered, post-lunch trauma, sleeping baby on the monitor… I am soon to follow.

    Now I know why I go to work and Daddy stays home.

7 comments:

Pink Shoes said...

Thanks for the glimpse into my life in about three months. For now I am entertained by the first tastes of cereal which are being met with the cutest of scrunched up noses.

Girl said...

Mmmmm....doggie kissies...fun!

mibi52 said...

I'm giggling, remembering those days.

Here's the good news: despite what Lysol and Clorox advertise to us, little ones rarely get sick from doggy licks, even doggy licks on hands that will then go immediately into baby's mouth. Think of it as building up baby's immune system.

The real problem with those hard graham crackers: pieces of them will end up pushed into baby's ear canal, or up the nose.

I think little mini-tongs should be issued with all newborns.

Either that, or there should be a lovely bar in the ER, so when said baby's and mommy go there for removal of the offending item, one can order a nice Cosmopolitan. Wouldn't that make the whole ER experience so much more mellow?

pb said...

Notice how Baby never fears the dog licks.

Even my spoiled GrandDog loves to lick babies. It's good for them both. God does have a sense of humor, after all, and the baby giggles and doggy-tail waggles must be an earthly manifestation of his laughter!

will smama said...

I am not even close to a germ-a-phobe. I am fine with the dog licks (although dog licks hand, hands pets/pulls on dog, hand goes in mouth is a bit gross).

I was mainly just caught by surprise that he does not put things on his tray in his mouth. It would make our life so much easier.

I know, I know - it will come.

As for a bar in the ER, my parents would have LOVED that! They were in there quite a bit with me.

Bad Alice said...

Oh, those sweet days. Unfortunately, moving along, I still can't get my 3 yr old to eat anything.

I'm with mibi on having bars in ERs. Why has no one thought of this? Given how long you have to wait, imagine the money they could rake in, plus, you may have to be admitted as well, thus increasing their revenue!

Gord said...

This is priceless. Are you sure you haven't been to our house at meal time?

Oh and we found that a gate across the kitchen works wonders to keep dog and eating child separated.